Are Academics Boring

Are academics boring? was a rhetorical question.

In my opinion, someone who thinks deeply into a subject matter cannot be boring. I am in the academic world and I dont think I am boring.
Recently I ve been reading best gayblogs, top ten gay blogs and other gay blogs etc. and I ve observed that many of them are assuming that gay men must have sex, must date and must sleep with someone to fulfill their need for intimacy. I dont really understand that. Sex might make me feel good , but sometimes does not make me feel really good. After many casual sex experiences I found myself unsatisfied for my intimacy needs. That s when I was calling my close gay friend and wanting him to lay down next to me and talk. I was not finding him attractive, and I was not even considering having sex with him. Feeling him next to me was giving me great pleasure.

I watched the Spanish movie The Sea Inside last night, it is about a man, who had a diving accident 28 years ago and was quadriplegic since then. His older brother and his family had been looking after him so he has been fully dependent on other people. But what he really wants is to die, kill himself which he is incapable of. Noone in the family is willing to help him to die, and they cannot even understand his will/ decision to die. This lawyer woman who looks after his case falls in love with his poems, writings and finally with him. He likes her too, however he thinks he s not capable of loving someone, because he is quadriplegic. This woman just loved him, they fantasised about each other, and that was it. Then they moved separate ways. That was the love story we were told during the movie.

The woman was able to understand him, because she wanted to kill herself many times. We learned that she s been having brain strokes, and eventually will become a vegetable. Fearing the future they both wanted to die, and that was what brought them together. The definition that healthy love is love when two people are independent and balanced and co exist without being too dependent on each other, is totally crap. I tend to be attracted to people if I can understand their motives for life, and when I start thinking that they have something that I do not have (although not true). This seems to be the rule of attraction.

Reading and thinking about healthy relationships lately, hehe